:))

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

BB visits my blog very often.. =P

I just realised that my BB visits my blog almost everyday. Makes me smile from ear to ear. Anyway, today was not a very happy day for me. And these are the following reasons

I realised that my leave for the public holidays will be carried over to next year after my probation period is over.
I've to find a way to make sure that i rest enough and go fetch BB from the airport when she returns. I must and i want to go fetch her coz she's my BB. I want to be the 1st person she sees, hugs and talk to when she returns. =P
Left my hp in uncle's car so i was unable to recieve my BB's msg or calls for the entire day
One of the Senior PSA complained about being very busy coz i had to ask her so many questions about the operating theater (OT) bills
I almost entered a few wrong entries for ward and OT bills a few times
I got tired
I still do not have a specific role to play in the office and this is making me dislike the job
The Senior PSAs enjoys talking in dialect or malay to the other colleagues. Mind you she's chinese. Simply put, i hate to feel that i'm being left out in conversations.
I think none of the senior officers or senior PSAs like me. I love having people like me.
I was to sit at the counter and learn from this lady who was real soft and she goes real fast. Half the thing she says is not registered in my head. But she's a real nice lady.

All of the above stated reasons make me unhappy coz i either don't understand or don't have a way around it as yet. I hate problems. I hope one day i can do as i like. Come and go as i please.

But there's one thing that made me happy before work ended today.

On top of the 14days of leave that i get every year, i get an extra 10days due to public holidays next year, not counting my public holiday off days for this year. Given that if i work on public holidays. And if the public holiday is on a sunday, monday is also a public holiday. SO....if i work on both days...i get 2 days of hols...haahaa...

-iWrote 12/22/2004 07:26:00 PM

Monday, December 20, 2004

Today is a happy day

My sugar baby is going to come home soon. Before i know it, it'll be Christmas then even before i can even notice that the New Year is around the corner, baby's back!! haahaa..how time files when you're busy. Tomorrow will be exactly 1 week to the day my baby comes home!! I'm going to visit my baby after work next tues (28th) 'coz i know i won't be able to fetch her from the airport as i've to work that day. But if my superior allows me to choose which day to clear my Christmas off day, i'll still not choose that day coz i would rather put it on new year's eve or new year's day. That way, my baby can rest when she returns from the airport and we can spend the entire new year's eve or new year's day together. Then again, new year's day is a public holiday so i get another off day. Yeah!! That off day i'll leave it to BB to decide when she wants me to take it. But this is all just pre-planning. Whether or not i'll get my leave is still an unknown. But to have my BB back is already the happiest thing. =) Other than getting my job withing 2 weeks after the results were released. =P Oh BB!! I LOVE YOU!! muack muack!!

-iWrote 12/20/2004 07:10:00 PM

Sunday, December 19, 2004

Is it just me?? I doubt so.

I feel so unjustified. When my mum and my bro are logger heads at each other, my mum will start being nice to me. Obviously she's afraid of being alone and well knowing that i'm a extreme softie at heart, i would hold nothing against her. Lest say keep my guard up against her. OK..i know there are bound to be a few of you reading this and disagreeing with me. But i'm the one facing it and if those of you who disagree with me, maybe you can take my shoes and walk in them for a mile. But i bet you'll crumble at the weight and all after a few blocks. So let me say this. I detest the role that i have to play when i'm at home. And it all boils down to detesting my mum from time to time.

My mum often complains that she doesn't like my bro's ex-gf's mum. And guess what??!! She still allows him to go visit her at her place!! Oh..not only that. She even lets him stay over at her place. And today is the last straw. She actually let my bro grab a bottle of red wine from home (plus alot of other gifts he bought when he went out) and give it to them!!! My goodness!! Is she deaf and blind to her own words and actions? If i were to tell her that i am still keeping in contact with my BB, she'll go insane. And if i were to tell her that BB's still my girlfriend..HA!! She's gonna start screaming, threatening me with suicide and throwing me out of the house. But then again, i'm not afraid of her throwing me out of the house now coz i've a job. When you've got a job, you've got an income. With income, anything is possible. Money makes the mare go round. But it's just the suicide thing. Coz everyone in my estate knows my family as my mum the the famous rule-by-the-rod tutor. So if the civil service ambulance comes to my place again, me against a few hundred mouths, i would become the unforgivable sinner. Oh well..but i guess those of you who still thinks i'm wrong to detest my mum as stated in the 1st para would already think that i am already that unforgivable sinner.

After all these spades of events between my bro, his ex and my mum, i've only 1 thing to say. They are all weak. One moment crying then next screaming and fighting. If all doesn't work, then they start saying that they want to die. To me, both are like the typical women of the olden days. Yi ku, er nao, san shang diao. How childish. If life was that hard to lead, i would have been the first one gone. They've not tried placing the blade near their skin and watch the blood slowly seeping out of the wound as i had when i carved myself. I was 12. My first encounter with sweet soothing pain. Mum said i just wanted attention. That was not true. I wanted not attention but the feeling of being near death but yet not endangering myself. My mind was sound and is still sound. But how sound will it be in future?? I don't know. The most beautiful way to die is the most painful. Not jumping off the cliff or slashing your wrist or hanging or anything that others have tried. It's just inducing an heart attack. But for my BB, i will keep my mind sound. And i will definately outlive my mum who has caused almost all of my misery.

Like what my friends who understand what i had gone through, am going through and will go through in future had said. Save yourself. Get a stable job with a stable income, start having savings and move out. I have come a long way from rejecting my exes when they ask me to stay over to finally work out ways to overnight at my BB's. Moving out is the last step. I need time and alot of planning. But when the time comes, the time comes. I just need my savings and a pre-planned place to go to once that happens, which is of course my BB's place. Who would be happier than her other than me. =P

-iWrote 12/19/2004 08:26:00 PM

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Back from work...

Work was great today..got praised by my trainer..she said i was hard working..yeah!! 1 pt for me!! Time really seem to pass really quick when you're doing work. Another has passed and another day nearer to BB's return. I forgot what else i wanted to say about work already. Oh yes..2 certain doctors seem to be homosexual. Other than that..oh..had a chat with my boss over lunch..he's such a nice guy..quite approachable..i said quite coz he's your boss and bosses normally have this kinda air ard them that makes them a lil scary..haahaa..maybe coz they can fire you anytime.. =P

The mail will reach my BB tmr!! YEAH~~!! finally!! a huge burden off my shoulders..heeehee..

-iWrote 12/16/2004 06:31:00 PM

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

I'm going to start work tmr..no news of my mail reaching BB yet..packed my desk and drawers and my cupboard..but not the whole cupboard..that'll be too much for 1 day..hope to hear from my BB soon.. =P

-iWrote 12/15/2004 09:41:00 PM

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

I am getting worried about my parcel....

It's been 1 week and my parcel has not reached my BB yet..I am starting to get worried and am kicking myself in the ass for not using DHL..the parcel is late..very very late. I seriously hope that the parcel reaches within this week if not it is never going to reach my baby. I am getting really really very very worried. i sent it 2 1/2 weeks before Christmas and it's still delayed so long?? The bloody singpost guy said that it is gonna reach there within 4 days..today's the 8th day..fine..i'll give it 12 days..which means, by the end of this week, it had better reach my BB if not..i think i'll have to go to the post office and see if i can retrieve the mail or redirect it..damn!! this is so troublesome..if it were something to save a person, the person would've died!! GOD!! Why in the world is it taking such a long time??!!! @#$%^&*

No news from the hospital......

I'm still not called to work yet?? maybe they'll call tmr?? sigh..it's alright even if they call next week..i just feel kinda out of sorts to work right now coz i'm really worried about my parcel..i just hope that it reaches my BB..i really am in no shape to go to work..

Queer eye for a straight guy....

Had been watching it on the com today from some CD-R BB borrowed and in turn lent it to me. I just found out that actually there's alot to shaving..for guys that is..2 things that i found out...you are not suppose to shave against the grain..so if your stubble is growing downwards..shave downward..if it's growing upwards..shave upwards..and..it's dangerous to shave that quick..lots of those re-made guys on the show get cut by the blade shaving that fast..haahaa..funny to watch..you can really tell which guys are homophobic and which guys are not..haahaa..OMG...haahaahaahaahaa...damn funny...

Ah...long nails....

Like what BB's friend, J, said..no self respecting lesbian would keep long nails...or any nails at that. and since my BB will be away for a month..i've decided to take on the striaght girl look..which means long nails. But also not forgetting my you've-gotta-look-chic mindset..which happens in all GLBT..i'm getting them manicured soon..maybe tmr or during the weekend. 1st will be a french manicure then later..maybe..a dark red one later..but then again..if i get the job..french manicured nails will look real chic with that nurse's uniform..*drool* haahaa...so..i guess i'm gonna set for french manicure till my BB returns..and..*poof* i'll make my nails disappear..heehee....

BB's return and Princess death anniversary

I just realised that the day my Bb returns home is the day my beloved dog passed away a year ago..wow..1 yr..how fast it passes..i really wonder what has happened to her..i've always wondered about the after life..they say all dogs go to heaven..i wonder what dog heaven is like..is there like dog biscuits hanging from the trees and plants?? then is there delicious food whenever they want to eat?? sigh..i miss Princess.. =(

ok...my neck is aching..i had better stop sitting in front of the com..it's been 1 whole day already..yawn..kinda tiring..

-iWrote 12/14/2004 08:41:00 PM

Monday, December 13, 2004

I guess i'll be starting work on Wed coz the hospital didn't call me today..hope there isn't anything wrong with my medical report.

Today..i said something wrong. BB called me this afternoon when i was on my way back. Was overjoyed when i saw her incoming call. But i guess i used the wrong words. I really didn't mean to say that i didn't want to help or neither was i saying that...sigh..nevermind what i said..i just didn't mean to make her frustrated..feel so bad..i mean i am more than glad that i am able to help BB look for transportation and stuff online..hope my BB isn't upset over what i said anymore..sigh..BB..i love you..hugs hugs..2 more weeks to your return..can hardly wait.. =P

-iWrote 12/13/2004 09:24:00 PM

Saturday, December 11, 2004

Medical Check-up..

If all goes well..i'll be working latest by wed..i'm both excited and scared..new environment..new people..new faces everyday..

Haahaa..i just flicked my cat's ear coz she was blocking the screen..haahaa...ok..not funny..it seems like it hurt..ok..shan't do it again..feel so bad..gonna sayang her..brb...

ok...back..where was i?? ah yes..my check-up...it was alright and the nurses where all real nice..shall elaborate on a certain incident when i'm more awake..shall end here for now..tata..

-iWrote 12/11/2004 09:43:00 PM

Friday, December 10, 2004

I am employed!!!!

i no longer need to sit at home and idle..i've finally got things to do and am earning money..but the thing is..i don't know when my BB can call..i still hope to hear her voice at the other side of the line..without hearing from her, i can't put my mind at ease..sigh...i just have to work something out again..

Woe is me...unemployed not happy...employed also not happy..time is hard to pass when i'm unemployed..then now when i'm employed...how am i to talk to my BB..then again..she can save up the money to go shopping...but then again..i wish to hear from her...there's just so many things that i want..oh...woe is me!!! sigh...

-iWrote 12/10/2004 07:08:00 PM

I am very bored...very very very bored...somehow, i wish that time will pass by even faster..if only i can "find" time..get hold of time and hurl him (good thing no one refers to time as her..) forward to BB's return.

A bad thot just struck me..all of a sudden, i don't want a full time job in any hospital or anywhere..i want a part time job..haahaa..then i can meet BB more often and i might get more days off..as compared to a full time one..bad thot bad thot..shoo!! go away..i must be ambitious and full of drive..*nod nod*

18 more days to BB's return..half way there already...can't wait for BB to return then i cook the prawn omolette for her...get char kway tiao...cai tao kway...prata...tei tarik...huge servings of roasted chicken for 2...the sugarcane juice from the nice and pretty aunty...mutton soup...sliced fish porridge...prawn noodles with all the pork lard BB wants...hei bai from jolly bean..oh...anything...anything for BB's quick quick return...sigh.....BB....i miss you so so much...so much that i feel like i'm just wasting away without you here...BB..Please be home soon..

-iWrote 12/10/2004 01:50:00 PM

Thursday, December 09, 2004

Patient Service Assistant (PSA)

Some correction for my previous post on the job i was interviewed for. It is techinically speaking a 7am to 7pm job. But practically speaking, it's a 8hr job. You either start at 7am and end at 3pm or start at 10am and end at 7pm. This job requires you to work in teams due to the working time. Why? Coz the case that you might be handling might come in before you get to work or after u get off from work and your buddy will have to handle your case for you in the mean time.

What cases does the job require one to handle? It's simple but yet not that simple. You have to access the patient's financial records. Which means, one has to keep track and calculate how much the patient spends in the hospital and if they exceed the deposit, they'll have to top it up. That's not all. When the patient leaves the hospital, one will have to explain all the charges to them and they can pay by any means. And after they have left, if there is an excess of payment, we'll have to cut a cheque to them and if there is a shortage in payment, we will have to call them up and ask them to pay. Actually, everyone has met with such staff at the hospital. If one can recall paying a certain amount of money before being admitted into the hospital and at the end of your stay when you're leaving, you've to go check the bill with a certain service staff? Yes. That's the kind of job i'm applying for.

The boss told me that the job is 60-70% paper work and 30% customer service. And he also said that it's like the job of a clerk. Which i totally disagree. I hate the term 'clerk' anyways. Makes one think as though it's all paper work and paper work only. To me, i think the job is partly like a financial assistant. You help the patients cope with their hospital costs and understand why they are charged this way and that way.

Sigh..i'll be both happy and sad to get the job. Why? Coz if i get the job, i can start earning money and be independent. Which is what i have always wanted. But if i get the job, i might not be able to pick BB up from the airport when she returns from the US. But don't any of you get me wrong. I believe i'll enjoy the job coz it requires people to work in teams. Therefore, see..it's not a clerk type of job. A clerk sits behind a stack of papers all day long and the stack of papers always continue to rise. Oh..and a clerk also has no one to work with. No one to double check their work before handing it in and no one to help them with their job..willingly that is.

ok..i gotta go for my accupuncture again and head over to BB's place to visit mummy..heehee..another happy fun filled day for me..yeah!!

-iWrote 12/09/2004 09:03:00 AM

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Help!!

Why is everything in Chinese??!! Can someone please help me and tell me how to change everything back to English?? The blogger homepage and my..erm..what's that called..the page that opens after you login..know what i'm talking about?? yes yes both are in Chinese and as my BB knows, my Chinese isn't all that "powerful".

Interview interview

Anyways, i'll be going for a job interview at Mount Alvernia Hospital for the post of Patient Service Assistant at 2:50pm. If i did not remember wrongly, it's a night shift job and it's 7 days night/7 days off..not really sure..will confirm again when i get back from the interview..right now, my main problem would be that i don't know what top i should be wearing..

My readers

I didn't know my readers come from far and a wide. I thought only my friends and their friends read it. I got the counter to check which of my friends read my blog. And now, i actually realised that lots of other people read it too..wow!! Thanks everyone.

Thumpers

There was 2 queens party at Thumpers last night. For those who don't already know, Thumpers is a club at Good Wood Park Hotel. Just to side track a lil, the Durian cake that the hotel sells is terrific. The durian cream is smooth, thick and tastes better than the fruit itself. Haahaa..ok..for a cheaper alternative, coz the Durian Cake from Good Wood Park is really very expensive, you can try the Durian Concerto from Angie's Choice. Quite good. But definitely not better than Good Wood Park's. It really is 'you get what you pay for'. =P

Anyway, back to Thumpers. It's really a nice place but last night's crowd just kept smoking. The difference between straight smokers and GLBT smokers are that: Straight smokers do not start puffing away when they see they're friends doin it. GLBT smokers (or maybe just the les community) start smoking once they see their friends light up one after another. Talk about peer pressure. But then again, i might be wrong..so correct me??

By the end of 2hrs of being inside, my eyes sting and my throat got irritated. I thought the toilet would be better and i also needed to relieve myself. But when i got there, the whole place looked as though a fire just broke out. It was even worse than the dance area. In the end my eyes hurt so much and my new clean beautiful black velvet IZZUE.COM sweater soaked up all the smoke and stank. Sobs..i shall not wear that sweater to a club again other than to MOX.

I love MOX. Everyone has to go outside to the balcony to smoke.

Although the night started out a lil rough due to some problems, i had a lil fun. The 2 queens were wearing wings and a halo. They even got a wand to complete it all. Oh ya..Leandra and Taufik were there too. Haahaa..anyway, i carrassed one of the queen's wing and she offered to let me wear it but there was a price. I had to pose for a picture in it..i even got a copy of the picture. Nice..must be the hair..haahaa..but after i pic, i had to return it..no fun already. Will try to get someone to scan the photo in for me so that i can show all of you..heehee..the wings really look very nice and sweet..=)

-iWrote 12/08/2004 11:27:00 AM

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

Pictures Pictures!!

This was the 1st thing i ate and drank when i reached KL

I think they are gays that's why i took their pics..haahaa...the one on the far right not too bad looking..cute actually...

My cousin wanted me to play with her..so i decided to play with the cam at the same time..

The view from KLCC Petronas Twin Towers Skybridge..quite a nice view from there..

Me on the Skybridge...

Kinetic 1

Kinetic 2

Explaination for the sculptures....both say the same thing...oh yes..the sculptures can rotate one..

New type of perming...Digital perm..make me look like medussa...haahaa...

After the perm...i took the photo myself...no one help me...so sad..but i think i look nice..went to shop for IZZUE.COM clothes..the guy there say i look quite sexy when i was trying on the jacket..haiz..it's coz of what i'm wearing and the hair lahz...like what YS say..i look hot in curls, fringe and specs..haahaahaa...muack!!!

Parcel...

BB...the parcel is on the way..i hope the address is the right one coz ttz the inn that's near your sch..the other inn with the same name very far off..south of Oklahoma er...it should reach u latest by Monday..your Monday that is...hope u'll like the jacket...muack!!

-iWrote 12/07/2004 05:23:00 PM

Monday, December 06, 2004

BACK!!

Returned from M'sia just yesterday night. Yes yes..i know i'm supposed to be updating my blog with either the "happenings" of my trip or some pictures. But right now, as obvious as can be, i am not really updating..haahaa..bleh! *lol*

ok...i'm gettin a lil bored coz i don't know what to write...

Let me post some questions to me...haahaa

Why are you not talking bout your trip?? I'm sure the old geezers give you lotsa trouble..(i know ttz not a nice thing to say..i'm just bored..ok??)

Of course they gave me all the trouble i can possibly predict..and no..i didn't avoid those troubles coz i was on holiday..so was my mind..right now, i'm just thinkin of ways of how i could help my baby feel some warmt asap from all that cold.

For those who don't already know, my baby's in US..and it's winter over there..freaking cold..

How on earth are you gonna help her??

Well..i'm not telling..it's a secret..part of her X'mas gift too..(but i think she already knows what i'm sending her...but i'm still not telling...haahaa..). sweet eh?? but not as sweet as knitting a scarf or something..sigh..no time la..

Sending parcel overseas will take very long lehz..esp registered mails..

I know that..ttz why i'm using DHL..haahaa...1st time using k..so exciting...haahaa...(BB!! don't call me and tell me not use DHL coz it's ex..don't spoil my excitment and joy k..). Although it's very much more expensive..but at least it'll reach there within 4 working days if it's not held up at the customs. AND..it'll not get lost in the fucking mail...my gift is all my savings k..which means..i'm broke..yes..i've to spend all my money..but to keep my baby safe and warm and healthy...and to relieve her of those terrible terrible mood swings which are made worse from all that cold, it's totally worth it..MUACK!! a kiss for my BB...hee..

ok...now all of you who are reading my blog better comment and say that i'm very sweet..yes yes..click on the comment button and type...'u' space 'a' 'r' 'e' space 's' 'o' space 's' 'w' 'e' 'e' 't'....

just joking...right now, all i need is to hear from my baby as often as possible..yes..i know i sound really bad..i sound like i don't want my friends any more. (which is not true at all...my friends mean the world to me coz i don't have many) I just miss my baby alot and if any of you can understand the feeling of being separated for a month over such a long distance and the different time zones, you'll understand what i'm goin thru.

But that doesn't mean i'll forget my friends...actually..i think i've thought of a terrific plan. BB will always be calling me in the mornings coz it's night for her..so i'll be able to go out when she's aslp..but this is not a fool proof plan..just like today, after meeting up with S, my kor, for lunch and coffee, i went to settle some bills and buy pet food and went home..it was 4pm..2am in US..i supposed BB was slping but to my surprise and shock, she was not. She was awake coz YS didn't pick up the call (i presume incubation time was over and she had to continue with the project..i totally understand the time constrians on her) and BB's friend, C, came back to the hotel room very very tipsy and a guy she went out with, kissed C on the cheek. BB got angry. Haahaa..BB is just trying to be protective. And she msged me about it so i replied her msg and asked her to call me in awhile. Made her laugh over the phone. Which is both good and bad. Good coz BB is happy again. Bad (actually...it's a gd thing too...) coz she missed me even more after that.

hmm...i think i'm starting to sound incoherent..so i shall stop here..wanna get up as early as possible to msg my baby..and maximise our talk time...oh..bb..if you're reading this, can u forget about the 1/2hr quota i set this morning?? I miss you..think i'll be goin over to your place to visit your mum and see how she's doin this wed..she called me this afternoon..Hamster cage is clean..she just changed the shavings this afternoon. How i know? coz she called to ask me where the shavings were..heehee...

ok...ttz all for now..will load the pics soon.. =)

-iWrote 12/06/2004 11:18:00 PM